How to talk about money this holiday?

This holiday, you may probably meeting people, families and the opportunity to bring up topics that you may need but not want to take on – Money.

For example, do you have friends that have a lifestyle that you can no longer keep up with but you like to keep them as friends? Perhaps they are all single, and recently you just have a new baby or child in your life that you need to support? Or did you just lose your job in the recent tech retrenchment and can no longer afford or doesn’t want the fancy dinners?

Talking about money is awkward, especially when it is with friends or family.

Here’s some tips about it.

Tip 1

Start off by getting things off your chest by talking to a non-risky person, for example, a taxi driver, a stranger. This helps you get your thoughts organized and also maybe the stranger may offer you some insights. Sometimes it also helps the person simply listened to you. You can also talk to your therapist about the topic of money you have.

Tip 2

Choose the place and time to talk to this person. Maybe it is a family reunion you are going to be at. There is never the perfect time but make sure you let this person know you want to talk so this person make time and space for it.

Tip 3

Start off by listening and be non judging about the other person talking. This is so that the other person gets to talk as much as possible. Money is an emotional subject. Even if you don’t agree with what the other person has to say, keep a neutral facial expression, and continue to be an active listener. Money habits cannot be easily changed. The way a person buys things, treats things and continuously buy things is a relationship acquired from a very young age, deeply ingrained. You cannot change this person simply through an argument.

Tip 4

Think about who can help. If your sibling is constantly getting into financial mayhem, you might want to think of a money coach, online program or budgeting books to start the pace and later make it easier to get into the difficult conversation. Sometimes these books, online programs make it less shameful for the sibling to talk about their money issues. You also address the root cause of money issues.

Tip 5

This is probably not the first time or the last time this person is in financial trouble. You see, the part about money, how to live, buy things, save was never taught in school. Many people grow up with a hole in their hearts and many fall prey to advertising and buying more than they should. Therefore, think of something more long term, more beneficial than just lending this person money. Understand that the risk of having a money conversation. This person may never speak to you again, and may avoid you after this conversation about money. They may brand you as “busybody”, “too rude”. However if you are not intentional about your money, and talk about it, you can get into trouble easily.

Tip 6

Try to understand this person’s view about money and what are his or her values?

Avoiding and not communicating about money can hurt those you loved the most. It is vital to know where your siblings stand in terms of money

Here’s some lines

I recently came across a book about personal finance and been reading about it. You mentioned sometime back you are behind on your credit cards, I like to know more about how you are dealing with it. Any advice on how to use these credit cards I can use?

What does money bring you?

Are you confident managing money? What are some of your proudest moments regarding your own money?

Are you open to talk about money?

To friends who are going out for dinner. “I understand we normally go to these restaurants for dinners. Recently I have a baby, and I like to know if you are open to ideas of having dinner at my place instead of dining out? This will make it easier for me to keep to my budget. What are your thoughts?”

Tell me how you have been dealing with money and how you talk to your family about money this holiday season?

Author: iwantyoutoberich

Ways to understand money, love money, save money, make money and be rich and happy!